It is a shame I am your lover.

Thursday, August 13, 2009, 01:10

Breaking the habit.

Time check:one ten.
i've got school tomorrow, but i've ALSO got plenty of math to complete. never seems to end, these assignments. friday is Final exams already, so soon. fri, sat, mon, and we're done. holidays for seven weeks. might look for a day job (current job being sort of night.) and earn some extra income.. at the same time, being busy will get my mind off things.
so steve, dont worry so, im not going mad as pie, my head is just stuck in the past, and im having a hard time yanking my head out. i will, in due time.
had a fun chat with Quan.

Quan said (00:12):
LOL a+bj remind me of anal + blowjob
Eliz you anal bitch.(★). said (00:13):
OH MY GAWD YOUR SO FUCKING DIRTY

welcome to the world of complex numbers in rectangular form.

and i know. i meant to type YOU'RE.
in the mean time.

When you browse thru other people's life and see the problems they have, compare it to your own, and realize one of two things: your troubles are so minute compared to theirs, or their troubles are so minute compared to yours.

sometimes when you pop back into my life, my mind start ticking, non-stop.

when you hear a song you feel you relate to, but the song is not about how you're feeling.

time is flying, flying like doves. gotta go!
my leg's still swollen. :|
my throat's still gross. :|

random shot taken after Up. check out my awkward hand! and my new bangs too.

Labels: Emorant =\, MSNing ^-^, Ngeeann ah., sick :|

Monday, July 6, 2009, 00:04

Summer lovin'.

I cant believe. i just got a invite to friendster. gosh.

deleted my a/c last year cuz i got bored.. and hooked onto facebook. i got an invite, gosh. dunno why im so shocked too.

*****

Sunday. the sun peeped out for a while.. and then hide for the rest of the day. what a perfect weather for sleep-ins. went to church at 9 am (trying to kick start back my habit to be a regular church goer.. :}), choir, eat, practice, home by 3 pm. fell asleep while reading (Black Rabbit Summer- Kevin Brooks. try it! pretty good.), and woke up at around 7 i think? :}. then cont'd doing IS project *insert CB face* so tired of it. ours quite cock-up alr lah. i think we either fail, or pass miserably.

*****

Isaac came down to find me about an hour ago, think he was bored out of his skull too. talk cock, then he left. talk about the same old stuffs lah. havent seen him in ages also. he thought that there was no school tomorrow =\. cuz youth day. bullshitter. hahahaa. alamak got work tmr sia. =\. need to chiong. gonna a/c yx to lot 1, then kiakia a while, chiong down for work. BULLZ.

looking for ipod case leh. not the silicon one. i want a leather casing. black or white... or brown. would be ideal :].

Had another weird dream last night. wondering if it's due to stress, that im having such disturbing dreams? hmmmm.

=\. ah well. project. sleep. ciao~

xxxxxxx.

Labels: Booktalk, Churching :0, Dreams, Ngeeann ah., School. :), Songcraze, Studyinghard, What i want., Work :0

Friday, July 3, 2009, 23:09

And th hardest part of living is just taking breaths to stay.

YELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOW.

:O. First week of skl passed in a breeze. my my. my prediction that skl will close within a few days of opening kind of failed, guess im no fortune teller. FRIDAY LEI. so fast right.

first monday of the eleventh week was quite uncomfortable, feeling the slight nervy feel of first week. BUT i got over that. lessons are pretty boring and complicating, bad combination. and with the wrong.... feel, noone feels like studying. OH AND RIGHT. i passed all my common test subjects! *beams* so happy. Disappointed by the math result, didnt hit the A i was hoping-crossed-fingers-eyes-shut for. BOOOOOOOOOOOL. :/.

Boring ole DEP, speedo teacher. i ditched class for 45 minutes cuz i was bored out of my skulls. i missed 60 minutes of ENGMEC cuz i was hungry. shubeeeeeedoodle.

Aiyo. sian la. Many many assignments, tutorials, projects. jialat jialat.

Weihao's going to tekong!!! ): so sad sad sad sad sad sad sad sad. boo lah.

I've been having very creepy negative feel dreams. i once dreamed that my favourite white-grey bag was stained with red ink. another time that all 30 eggs we brought (in a grey tray) were cracked. sometimes it'd be so real that i'd stone for three seconds trying to figure which is reality. serious.

Hold on, before it's too late.

Labels: Dreams, Ngeeann ah., Songcraze, Studyinghard, The Whine

Tuesday, June 2, 2009, 15:06

Harsh words and comparisons.

Son of a gun.

what a day. wont say it's bad, just not my day.

First, my Is group (JW, ZQ, beeeeying, me) project was done on a last minute.

then, the bus took damn long, and bee ying and i couldnt get our sandwiches from atrium. had to rush for class cuz there was a test.

then, miss maisie ong called me and tell me she's sick. cannot hold extra remedial for me.

MC for two days. so tomorrow's lesson's cancelled too. double boo.

then. on the way out of school, i got stung by an insect. i'd think it's a bee. my finger's swollen now. my forefinger. third boo okay.

then i go to blogger.com, so that i can whine to the rest of the world about my day.

then blogger's having a.. ten minute's maintenance. just when i needed to whine.

HOW'S THAT FOR A PRETTY DAY?

Now let's talk about the nice pretty things that happened today.

Made two new friends! Beeying's ex-schoolmates, Esther and Alicia.

Pulled off the presentation in IS class.

I think that's about it. today's half gone only, hoping the rest of the day's gonna be A okay.

Who's anonymous? so curious.

Oh, i've got no work this week! (:

But no work means no money. boooo you.

Hope the cheque's comming soooooon. zoom zoom.

Balls. my nephew just lol at me on msn.

Eliz. eggsakly. says (15:07):
*bee sting me. now my finger like sausage like that
PrInCe Of HeLl says (15:07):
*lol
*wat color ur finger *~*
*pink red blue?
Eliz. eggsakly. says (15:11):
*pink. HAHA.
*cannot bend.
PrInCe Of HeLl says (15:11):
*pink sausage
*lol

Yeah. twice, now that i see. and idk what's with tHe cAps AnD aLl. LikE. hEllo BabE. Not cOOl.

Prince of hell?

(sidetrack: IM NOT AGAINST PPL TYPING LIKE tHaT. IM JUST COMMENTING ON MY NEPHEW. OKAY?)

cant he just be a prince?

rambling.

Blurring and stirring- the truth and the lies.

(Bye.)

Labels: Ngeeann ah., Songcraze, Studyinghard, The Whine

Saturday, May 30, 2009, 13:15

Miss you.

Hello weekend!

Saturday. not going out. staying at home to complete assignments and all. had one test and one quiz this week! passed both, one exceedingly well.

got 85% on EEPS test- though some would say it's a no kick easy peasy test to pass, this is the module which i've been depressed over. this is one module which i couldnt understand for weeks. and i got it :D thus, 85%. best news ever.

the quiz on Engmec was quite. disappointing. as usual i focused too much on the tougher subject that i forgot how to do the simpler ones. BOO. but a pass is better than none so.

past week's been filled with highs and lows, cant say it's been down in dumps cuz friends are there to support when i fall back. feeling bad cuz i snapped at danny and suren during engmec (when i was studying like crazy for EEPS.) DANNY MY NANNY. :} my best friend. hehe. and suren my haribo partner.

we've been going out to makan for our long breaks... becuz Wilson's got a car :) so damn convenient laaaaa. last thursday everyone left their bags in the car and walked to bt food centre. i think we had ten odd people, obviously cant fit all in, so fit their bags and off we go. i took the car cuz i am lazy and lazy. yay. then yesterday too, lesser people so we squeeze into the car and went to eat at clementi.. then went to city vibe to kiakia. got the boys excited over the arcade. Jonathan wasted 4 bucks on the soft toy machine. then a dollar on the fighting game machine. it's been ages since i last stepped into an arcade. bad memories.

working tomorrow, same place. moooooolah. my not spending scheme seems to be working, i only took money from the wall once this week.

need to do the consession thing again soon! i forgot when i last did it *frowns*

a few mondays ago i think.

Auden, is it now, my Tasmanian Devil? - The secret of lost things by Sheridan Hay.

Been reading this book for ages. reading really slowly cuz i dont really have all the time in the world. anymore.

Oh! and my parents went down to school to sign the TGS already!

When we talk, the world is forgotten, along with time. with curiousity, i asked you what they said. and with regrets, we both wondered. you asked me a question, and i pushed it away with a you know it's not gonna happen. how i wished something would. with solemn eyes, you looked at me, and my heart broke twice.

(what could've... should've.)

Labels: Booktalk, Ngeeann ah., School. :), Songcraze, Weh random :D, Work :0

Wednesday, May 27, 2009, 20:58

Get it over with.

Feeling quite tired of everything suddenly. remembered the survey in the library: how many day in a month do you feel full of energy? i wrote 4, cuz there are four weeks in a month, and weekends, more specifically, saturdays, are my sleep days. but sunday is a work day, which mean that i have to finish all my assignments on saturday. bah. how often do you think of life after death? quite often, not that i've figure it out anyway. so i keep on thinking.

so tired.

kind of fucking tired of doing all the work. forgetting. cursing myself. doing overdued assignments. tired tired tired. stoning in class. trying to concentrate. kind of not working but.

just trying.

and yes. i lied. i dont feel full of energy 4 times a month.

[14:14, class.]

Labels: Emorant =\, Ngeeann ah.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009, 21:54

Twenty twelve.

Feel.

Lessons today..went by like a breeze.. not exactly smooth sailing, more like turbulent wind i guess. Quite. Had delicious peanut pancake thing. yums. New favourite easy to eat food. cheap too. hafiz brought a cup of corn to class (EG1). both of us got nagged at for bringing food. hoho. miss ong so cute. Bah. Math quiz tomorrow. tutorial pass up by tomorrow. autocad assignment by tomorrow. hello, why am i blogging. i've been very angsty recently. how sia. classmate also said. 'siala why so angry sia?' ): AI DUNO WAI LAIDAT. so frustrated. stress also, hell. on brighter note! Engmec. i think im understanding more, thanks to Ray's tutoring. and answering all my goondu questions. Yay.

So tired. IS class. next tuesday got speech again. how sia. newspaper article, need to find something interesting.

back to EG1, bye anyone!

Because it's facinating to watch you breathe, and all your quirky expressions.

Labels: Ngeeann ah., Songcraze

Thursday, May 14, 2009, 23:23

Boy with no name.

Travel the world with me.

School started late today, lessons from eight to twelve were cancelled due to Graduation. so our lesson started at 2 :B

Met Nas earlier. slackslack. talktalk. walkwalk. atrium and everywhere. saw Ivan halfway and made him come with us. thn meet Fizzzzzy. :]. Then go class... Engmec. SLEEEEEP. i know right. go class sleep. stupid right. but was feeling unwell. felt like vomitting. have been feeling vomittish for a while already. im not pregnant. shut up. couldnt vomit cuz i didnt eat. sooooo. sleep. then EEPS. HELL YEAH. finally understoon all the wires. and finally learnt how to read the bloody diagramme. quite like sudden enlightenment. sound so bull right. but i just kept pestering Nas and Dhamal (sp?)... and i finally figured out. so fucking proud of myself *beams*.

Peipei's wedding's coming! so soon la. time flies. even when you're not having fun. though i am. bloopbloop.

TSK. feel like. escaping. disappearing. into another timezone for a day and return at the same time. leave at 23.31 for 24 hours and return at 23.31 same day. GAAAAAAAAAH. too much movie. or something. overactive imagination.

I wanna watch X-men AGAIN LEY. really good. Hugh jackman's really hot. so sexy. im gonna watch the previous few x-men movies. YEH. something to look forward to. but like no time to watch leh. shit la.

I want. a deliciously good camera. and. new bedsheets. and. spaghetti. and. wooden bangles. and. Dan brown books. and. foolscape. and. time. and. MONEY. and. a vacation. and. encore contact lenses. ALICIA. MY CONTACT LENS. and. so much more.

i know. right. demand. buy something for me. love.

*bite lips*

Tell me you name, stranger.

Bye. SKL TMR. WLU. DAI. WDING. SATRDY. MSIA. YESAH.

Labels: Booktalk, Hookies., Ngeeann ah., sick :|, Weh random :D, What i want.

Monday, May 11, 2009, 19:15

Caught me here.

Hellllllllllllllllllllllo.

school ended at one today. slacked/nua-ed/did math until 2 oddish. rained the whole day. today i understood ELTECH! (: must sit in front more often.

realized that i've left many assignments undone ): autoCAD, MOL, tutorials, handouts. see already also sian. sigh.

saw zichuan bringing around 2 HG girls earlier!

so i got home.. then checked thru hw, decided on one to do, and promptly fell asleep ._.

am i good or what. gerald said im a pig. BOO. and NO, i did not put my head anywhere near the laptop so it wasnt hot, i shirted down. AND i was on the bed. weather's perfect for a sleep-in.

so i just woke up half an hour ago :}

felt HELL LOT better than 2 hours ago, when my stomach was hurting so badly i cant even stand properly. felt like vomeeeeting too, despite the fact that i had not had a sit-down meal today. ate haribo, drank soya bean, you know. snaaaaaack.

tired lei. feel so piggish.

one day im gonna steal of of school's table and bring it home.

one day.

When you set a bird free, it will soar and not look back.

* * * * *

Went out with alicia on sunday!

we went to Suntec and... fareast. brought TWO tees. ONE bag. ONE bracelet. ONE watch. ALOT of food. as usual. majority of moooolah is spent on food. screw food. next time i go out i'll just salivate and chew on styrofoam or smt. gonna watch a movie with Noooooooooooel tomorrow! so excited lor. WOLVERIIIIIIIIIINE AHHHH.

Isnt Hugh hot.

BORED. DO ASSIGNMENTS. BYE POPE.

Your eyes told me stories you words denies. whom to listen to, the heart whimpered.

Precious things- tori amos

Labels: Ngeeann ah., PICTUREZ., Songcraze, Weh random :D

Thursday, May 7, 2009, 22:13

Giving up.

Had quite a bad morning, was quite sick until the point when i dont really wanna go to school. but i went. for EEPS. lecturer (sir!) said lesson's pretty important, you skip you liao. so i went despite the whinny eliz whining up a storm in my head.

so it was a good idea, until 3 pm. bacause 14 students from PB22 went to Beauty world to eat together. like. class outing. cuz it was a far walk. yes, we walked. working up an appetite huh. so.. food was great, company was awesome, bonding was the best. was so cheerful after that two hours long break.

then come EEPS. i didnt understand a thing. i couldnt decipher the diagrams. and almost everyone else were following along fine. felt like fuck lor. just stood around and peep here and there. wires wires wires. and then nas reminded me the autocad guy's friend dropped out of poly due to EEPS. quite scared ah.

after school, cabbed home with jon. then they dont accept nets. JIAOWEI. so annoyed. so now i owe jon money. Walau.

I dunno why am i writing so much. im going nuts soon. my mom's asking me not to work for another 2 weeks.. cuz of my persistent cough and crazy timetable. ):. i think my immune system shutting down or something.

money eh. money or rest. money or rest. so fucked up.

stress ah.

Have been discussing life/death with my kakis.. What do you wanna be in future? how old do you wanna be when you die?

And i keep thinking.. thinking about life/death a lot recently. past few days lah.

Really demoralized after EEPS. Nas called me, then gave a wee bit boost to my spirits. thn steven called me. said my cough's really fucked up ah, take care of yourself ley. talk about work, army, navy, work, school (scratched the surface), meeting up, unsuccessful meetups.

Just for a minute, let me be. let me let go, let me break, let me scream, let me cry, let me scream. just. because i dont know when i'll just

forget it.

because i dont say.

Labels: Emorant =\, Ngeeann ah., sick :|, Uncertainties

Wednesday, May 6, 2009, 00:15

When im with you.

The boys (:

L-R: Jonathan, hafizzzzzy, nas, harris, iqbar.

Jonathan stays ard. my area. WALAU. and i nvr see him ard before luh. we live 8 minutes' walk from each other lei. went homw w him yesterday. 2 days ago. MONDAY LAH. bus bus bus.

* * * * *

I'm sick. EVERYONE'S sick. Nas is sick. alicia's sick. gerald's sick. EVERYONE IM CHATTING TO VIA MSN IS SICK. gerald said i got it from him thru' the net -.- siao one. hahaha. miss swift's done him in.

SICK AH. FORGOT WHAT I WNA BLOG ALR. TOODS.

Needing the money more than the rest.

Labels: Ngeeann ah., PICTUREZ., Rant., sick :|, Work :0

Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 20:29

Wolves.

I stole a photo from Nas' blog :D

Nas, Hafiz (background, black tee boy) and me. my kool klassmatez. we always break together.. makan or slack one corner together. and Nas always carry my laptop. Yay. laptop's super duper uber fuper lupin' HEAVY. and i mean heavy. my arm'd ache after carrying for like. 5 minutes. then change arm. then both ache. shiok much? so that's why Mister naso comes in handy :D hehe. he stole my smilies .__. i forgot to kill him. hahaha.

So far school's been.. really fun. everyday is something new, which is great. i'm looking forward to school, and im not as annoyed as i thought i'd be, to be waking up bright in the morning again. despite the super dry eyes. and the tendency to fall asleep on the bus ride home. if i take bus.

oh! and Jonathan's staying nearby!!! We might go to school tgt : D if we can manage to make plans. Ohhh. cannot dont mention the breaks. how i dread them during the first few days, and how i cherish them now! lecturers always release us earlier! so shiok. slack here, makan there. chitchat. listen to the boys talk about girls. try to comprehend malay language.

i've been trying the ban miens. and tomyams. walau. cannot find really good ones lei. how sia. how to beat WM's? had some barely cooked noodles and weak tomyam soup for lunch. boo.

Tomorrow im working at six.

i get off at six from school.

heng lecturer said that he normally end early (: HENG. or i dai.

k la. im done ranting. forgot what else i have to say.

BAI!

you know what? i miss you already.

Labels: Happypost, Hookies., Ngeeann ah., PICTUREZ.

Monday, April 27, 2009, 20:32

Trouble leave and return twice as big.

Awesome.

my 'enter' button is still cocked up. having a very hard time, no pun intended, while using it. now trying to find a way to use my laptop without using the enter. like. an alternative button. booooobieee. mo pian. who dont use enter?!?!!

went for laptop config. with Grace and Nas today, mine took DAMN DAMN DAMN long. I end school at one, at i left school only at 5 plus lor. half-way thru we went to eat, then I went to meet Suren @ LT 22 for a talk. Waaaaaah. tired. homework. but really lazy to do. :|

tomorrow need to do more on laptop *grumbles* super heavy. need a laptop cover really badly. heavy shit.

And isnt this nice! Today's Samuel Morse's birthday. goggle's so cool that when i got there i forgot what i wanna search. i was just staring at the Morse code. prolly for Google.

Bye :]

Labels: Ngeeann ah.

Friday, April 24, 2009, 23:38

Scars remind me

Awesome. i havent use the laptop for 5 days. totally awesome.

no time to use. bleh. school's been.. wow k. week one is over, finally. so far it's been promising :)

doing some very interesting things in our random classrooms/lecture theatres/whathaveits. light switches, binary numbers, COMTECH, oh yeah. i like. saw some Hg students over the span of five days. and i go home everyday with different people. HAHA. very full of shit right? monday danny and co., tuesday beeying, and so on.. kinda forgot the rest la. :].

getting to school early is so tough. probability of getting enough sleep is low. getting on bus 185 at 6.45am is impossible. so i gave up trying. gonna take bus/mrt/bus from now on, to school. uphill/downhill's killing my legs. constantly aching. struggling along in ELTECH is tough. physics much.

BUT on the bright/fried side, classmates are mostly pleasant, yes. math is in my life again. getting a lot of excercise. have a group of rowdy/noisy friends. and early dismissals are great too. and 15 minutes break. (i think we took our break too seriously. we went out of campus. hahaha.) and funny teachers. and having subway in school kinda rock, even if i havent had the chance to have it due to its popularity. Subway cookies FTW. Get to meet Noel almost everyday too! : D! Missed her sooooo much. having her in the same school is sooo great, she's like my guardian angel k. she tip me on everything and anything under the sun.. she lend me her textbooks (yay to saving money : D) that cost like ave. $15 per book. im just gauging. gosh. gauging is such an ugly word. bleh.

Sometimes,the things you say hurts even if i dont say it does. yes, ms put-on-a-strong-front. what happened to break down and cry? i hate you and your moodswings. YOU. read.

Worked today @ 1PD. With Isaac the siaokia. went straight to 1PD after school ends at 5.. and only got there on the dot. Didnt get my clothes, so Isaac went to my house to get it for me (: many many thanky. or i confirm late. even if i cab. work was whining session/update on how's school going and how classmates are....amongst sign ups and top ups. working on Sunday *stabs self* too. So i guess i cant go out tomorrow until i finish my homework/assignments/tutorials. HELL LOT. watch me gag. *breathe* think about the money. pocket money. clothes. shoes. laptop bag. wdv.

Mistake? dont know.

confused? much.

Dont know if i can keep moving along.. maybe the tide will bring me down, once and for all. i wonder if i am doing the right thing, juggling like an untrained clown. the balls fall, one after another.

missingy.

Labels: Ngeeann ah., School. :), Work :0